Which is faster?

Last summer, I created this spoof ad when I purchased my zero turn radius mower. I was excited about the new mower. From what I had heard, I would likely cut my mow time in half - a nice thing since I was spending about 6 hours mowing the entire 5 acres on my old trusty (please, note that adjective) John Deere mower.

The answer to the question, "Which is faster, the mower or the whippet?" Oh, definitely the whippet. The answer to the question, "Which is faster the mower or the turtle?" Oh, the turtle.

This mower has been a lemon. I had to have taken back to the dealer 4 times last summer. Three times, it popped a belt. At first they just replaced the belt (the belt was fine). Then they started criticizing my mowing technique: I was mowing grass that was too high. I was mowing grass that was too wet. This is supposed to be a commercial grade mower. I see those guys with lawn services out buzzing around at 7:30 am, far before the dew has burned off. They mow at full speed. I'm not. I'm afraid to go that fast. The last time the mower stopped working, the blades were messed up.

I am jus' a lil' ol lady mowing her 5 acres. I am not a commercial lawn service mowing 12 hours a day 5 days a week.....seems like the mower should be a little bit tougher, eh?

Today, when I tried to mow for the first mow of the spring, it ran rough. After one trip around the back yard, I discovered that the belt was fraying. I called the dealer (they should be on my speed dial). The conversation didn't go well. Basically, they blamed it on me: I'm mowing to fast, the grass is too wet, the grass is too high (only weeds are growing, the grass hasn't started to grow; I was trying to get started before the grass is too high), must have thrown a stone that was causing the belt to wear. My conclusion: this mower is only good to mow grass that is dry, 1/8 inch taller than the last mow, and in an area where there are NO twigs, stones or other things that might irritate it's sensitive constitution. The dealer seems to be unwilling to entertain the idea that the mower is a lemon. Of course, I bought it exactly one year ago so now the warranty is likely defunct. GRRRRRR.

I still think zero turn mowers rock. Just not my zero turn mower.

Oh, yeah, and because I PO'd about the mower, I forgot to shut the gate. The whippets went for a run around the neighborhood.....ummmmm, not what I like because there are a lot of kitties in the neighborhood. Only two more years off my life. I blame this all on the mower.

Now for a break......